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Hi Gwen!

Spiritual Journey to Unconditional Love

​

On November 7, 2017 it will be exactly 11 months since my dark journey began.  At that time my soul was broken, incredible sadness and loss at the destruction of my marriage.  What began with blame and finger pointing, turned to shame and guilt, then deep sadness at the things I could not change about myself.  Transmuted to attempts to tear down walls I had built for protection.  All of this in an effort to understand the greatest gift of all, unconditional love.  Every step of this process involved the discovery of a new talent to be exercised for my betterment.  I feel the need to share my journey with others, so that when YOU meet loss, you too will have a place to start.  In laymen’s terms – what does it look like to remove your ego, how do you recognize the mirror, what really is that still small voice you hear, and how do you listen to it. 

 

Keep forever in your mind, that I know absolutely nothing, other than what I have gone through.  I am not an expert, I fall down, fail in my attempts, am inconsistent, and make mistakes like the rest of us.  I hope that this can be a place for others to come and share their thoughts on their healing journey.  I am open to discussion on other options and ways to heal (I love learning).  I will not tolerate bashing, I will not be vilified for my thoughts and beliefs, nor do I allow others to experience the same within this framework.  Nor will I hold your hands, your journey is after all your journey in life.  What I have to offer may not be for you, however you will have to do the work required to heal yourself if you wish to heal. 

 

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Cutting Cords

  • Writer: Wendy S. Hockenberry
    Wendy S. Hockenberry
  • Nov 18, 2017
  • 2 min read

When sitting at the table of love, all the parties should actively be participating in the meal, when that love goes awry the meal tastes bitter. Let’s face it, after every meal, you clear the dishes and walk away from the table – one party typically washes the dishes and the other walks away, right? Of course not, you will eventually end up at the table again for another meal whether it is with the person you shared the bitter meal, or an entirely new one. Cutting Cords is not as much about cutting a person out of your life as it is cutting the thing that made the meal bitter. Stalking my ex before I left showed me just how the whole situation brought out the worst in me. I had become my first ex and as much as I hated being followed, it was my turn to see the other side. This lesson I needed to learn disgusted me on all levels. I cut off all contact like a doctor who would remove a leg with gangrene that has no medicine for a cure.





I was reminded by my psychologist that it is OK to say, “I love you, but I just cannot be with you right now. Being with you made me a bad person.” Leaving all but the barest of necessities behind I began my journey alone seeking the medicine I needed for me. As Doug Adam’s relays the thought in Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy, a person who is secure in their worth, security, and safety (towel) will be given all missing necessities (Universal Laws). It was time to find my towel! In doing so I discovered that what I didn’t have I didn’t need, and what I didn’t know I could feel somehow! How do you know what you should cut from your life?





Ask yourself these questions:

  • Is this situation an addiction you cannot stop doing?

  • Has this situation changed who you are fundamentally?

  • What control can you place over yourself in the situation?

  • What exactly is it that you should walk away from?




These few questions should be asked after you have addressed the earlier ones such as Ego, Conditioning, Judgmental versus Value Judgment. Remember that in the end, you can take nothing with you but the love you have inside.


Last Updated June 11, 2018

For further treatment on this series please go to:

 
 
 

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